Vaughn: "Of course, taking on a group of four heavy metal musicians and an undead lord of darkness is no small task, so you will not be facing them alone. We have assembled a special team of top-notch commandos to assist you in your mission."
"Most people remember him as one of the foremost pioneers of 80's wuss-rock, in his days teaming with John Oates. However, most are not aware that he is an expert in explosives, high-tech weaponry and advanced military tactics. He is a very dangerous, unpredicatble, savage man, and I'm glad he's on our side."
"Quite possibly the single coolest man ever to walk the face of Earth, Hayes is extremely good working under pressure. A superb military tactician, he only one weakness: Finding a fine, foxy lady, and making sweet love to her down by the fire. Considering that the S.O.D. consists of hairy males, this shouldn't be a problem."
"Standing just 3 feet, 9 inches tall, Dio's incredibly small size is a great advatage when fighting in close quarters or infiltrating the enemy. When cornered, he can quickly disable any foe, viciously biting their ankles."
Vaughn: "Your mission is simple. Rescue Schultz, and defeat Sargent D and the S.O.D. This will not be an easy, Mr. T. Do you still accept this mission?
Mr. T: "Yeah, sucka. Let me at them N.A.M.B.L.A. foohs."
Vaughn: Um... Mr. T?
Mr. T: Yeah?
Vaughn: Never mind...