The Pages:

I'll crush you with my bare hands!
A clash of the two top icons of the 1980's! Details

The man from the South Side takes on the man from the Dark Side! Details

Mr. T takes on a bunch of savages, and he's not even supposed to be here today! Details

The threat is real! Helluva real! Details

Till all are one...
(Mr. T vs. Megatron II) One shall stand. One shall get thrown helluva far... Details

gimme fuel, gimme fire, gimme sumthin' to shut these foohs up
"When bands start sellin' out, I make it my bidness!" Details

I commiserate the imbecile
"I pity myself!" Details

(Mr. T vs. Megatron III) "I will crush you with my bare hands, suckah!" (Details)

"The trend ain't dead, sucka! You are!" (Details)

"Have a nice day, sucka!"

Mr. T is coming, and you're on his list...

My Commentary on my own pages:

MR. T vs. MEGATRON - My first T page, and one of the first things I did when I got my 11 megs from Geocities. This began as a PowerPoint presentation I made just screwing around one day. If I can find out where I put the disk with that on it, I may put it up here. As with all my other pages, this was made with Windows 95 Paint and a really cool unregistered shareware image-converting utility. A lot of people consider this to be my best one, which shows the massive amount of effort I put into all the others that followed it :) October 1999: Over a year after it was made, it's now been moved from Geocities (ugh) to Tripod (whoo!), and the images have been compressed more and the color schemes have been changed a bit. It's real cool, man.

MR. T vs. THE UNDERTAKER - It kind of shocked me that no one had made this yet. The bad thing about it was that at the time, the Undertaker was almost a good guy, and he was also partners with his evil brother (in wrestling reality: they ain't related in real life... Duh.) Kane. Then, not long after I made this, They pretty much became enemies again, and it screwed everything up. Oh well... Then, they got back together as a tag team, so it almost made sense again... BUT... Now, Kane's Mr. Good Guy, teamed with the 1-2-3 Kid, and the Undertaker WAS Mr. Evil Guy, until now, when he's gone for about 6 weeks for back and hip injuries. Another odd mistake I made: I had Kane pseaking freely, when the page was made even before he talked with the throat-vibrating thingy. Oh, well... Also moved in October 99. Just like Megatron, it's been "digitally remastered," with loading time cut by about 70%, new colors, backgrounds, and a new opening sound.

MR. T vs. CLERKS - Another one that should've been made long before I made it. The ending wwas originally different, and it wasn'boy, does this suck...t as good. Well, to be honest, it hella sucked. In the present version, after Jay asks what T wants, he asks if they're selling drugs, Jay moons him, and T throws him. Instead of the mooning, it originally had this stupid line, and then went straight to the throwing. (see picture) I made this frame when I was suffering a severe case of writer's block, and didn't think of a decent ending until later. And I'm not even supposed to be here today... This was also moved to Tripod and retooled a bit.

MR.T vs. ANTHRAX - My first that wasn't an obvious choice for a T site. In case you're wondering, Joey Belladonna is their ex-lead singer who left after some nasty contract stuff. That should clear things up a bit. This began my somewhat popular "Mr. T vs. Heavy Metal" series which was continued in Mr. T vs. Metallica, and in a few months will possibly include Pantera, Korn, and False Metal (but don't hold your breath). As of October, it's now located at Tripod, has new colors and stuff, and has a spiffy new opening sound. Recently, Joey Belladonna went on tour with Anthrax, so it seemed the page didn't make much sense anymore... Then, he dropped off the tour, wanting more money, so it makes sense again, heh.

Mr. T vs. Megatron II: MR. T vs. UNICRON - You know, most people really seem to like this one, and some even say it's the best I've done, but in my opinion, I really screwed the pooch on this one. It ended up being rather long and tedious, and Mr. T doesn't even get mentioned in most of it. I considered redoing it, but it's the same as it's ever been. There's actually parts still missing from the story. I planned on doing some stuff with T landing on the Junkion planet, but I couldn't find any pictures of Junkions... That's why there's the huge hole in the story... D'oh! In historic-type news, this was my last T page on the Geocities account. Also, it was the last to be moved to Tripod :)

MR. T vs. METALLICA - This may very well be my masterpiece. Even die-hard fans of the trendy, commercialized, newer Metallica albums LOVE this thing. (and in case you were wondering, the Black Album is NOT "old Metallica") It reached 300 visitors at a point when Megatron was just hitting 200, and 1000 before the others hit 400. Furthermore this is one Mr. T vs. page that needed to be made. The only other anti-Metallica propaganda pages out there seem to be ignorant "oh boo-hoo, they cut their hair" garbage, or "Metallica suks (sic) Marolinn (sic) Mansin (sic) is totally kewl (sic)" crap. It's funny that a page that accuses the current Metallica of being evil, alien robots is among the most intelligently written pages against them. Jeez. Oh, and there's another "lost frame" here, like in Clerks. This originally went after the Teletubbies zapped him, but I left it out because it wow...didn't really help much, and he already had said almost the same thing a few frames earlier. (See picture ) Now you know. And knowing is half the battle. This was my first (and so far, only) page to be listed in Yahoo. I get email about this one about once every few days, which is impressive, considering my other T pages have gotten a total of 2 emails. I made a hate mail page for this one, but positive mail outnumbers hate mail about a million to 1... Oh well, you can't have it all, I suppose... Eventually, I plan to compress the images for this one, like I did with all the others. Oh yeah... Over 12,000 visitors for this one. Needless to say, that's a record for me. (even more impressive if you consider a few thousand that didn't get counted in the months when I didn't have a counter) Ever since S&M came out, I was getting about 5 emails a day that were all about 100 pages long and said the exact same things, so the mail page is no more. Sorry.

MR. T vs. BIZARRO T - This had a major technical advancement, as it used a cool-ass java applet (courtesy of Troy "Trenchcoat" Wood) to only take up one page. It was the second to do so, and I think there's three now. Anyway, it's slightly based on the "Bizarro Jerry" episode of Seinfeld, which is why Seinfeld and Newman appear in it. I'd just like to say that it is a very difficult thing to figure out just what a "Bizarro T" would look like. Like all my other T vs. X pages, this one got a makeover recently, with a new version of the background (you can read the text now!), and faster-loading images.
WOW - I just checked out the
T Awards page (the page that rates all Mr. T vs. X pages, based on a 5 voter panel - which I was on), and Bizarro T was the highest ranked one, and came one vote away from a perfect score. All I can say is this: What the hell were you people thinking?? I honestly didn't think the page was that good at all. I figured if a page of mine made the list, it would be Megatron or Metallica. Ooookay...

Mr. T vs. Megatron III: MR. T vs. GALVATRON - After about 6 months and 60 images, this finally was finished, resulting in the largest of all unpopular Mr. T pages. Also, this gave me the biggest case of Mr. T page BURNOUT ever imagined. Looking back, I have to say that it wasn't one of my best, but it had some cool moments, including homages to the Optimus Prime / Megatron battle in Transformers the Movie and the end of the Christmas episode of South Park ("Something feels... unfinished."). It was just too damn long... I made a recent HUGE update here. It was taking about 5 minutes to load every page, so I took the time to download every picture and re-save them, helluva compressing the images... The /galvaTron directory in this Tripod account used to take up almost 3 megs... Now, it's about 900K. Needless to say, the image quality suffered a lot, but it was well worth it, considering how huge that page is. Also recieved a slight makeover (new logo, background) with my other T pages.

MR. T vs. PANTERA - After about a year of promising people I would make it, I finally did In the last few days of January. This was a major confidence-boost, as I not only FINISHED a T page I started (T vs. Mick Foley and T vs. Metalwarrior were still half-done at the time), but I also managed to finally do one in less than a month for the first time since Bizarro T (sometime in late 1998). The main focus of the page is how those "tough" guys in Pantera were a girly glam band in the 80s (click HERE for proof), and in the 90s, have done nothing but rip off the lesser-known band Exhorder. It's better than it sounds. Honest. A milestone here, as this is the first page I appear in. The hand holding the Exhorder "Get Rude" cassette is in fact my hand. I'm such a sellout :)

MR. T vs. MICK FOLEY - This page was originally attempted before Mr. T vs. Metallica, way back in 1998, but there just weren't any ideas coming to mind. The Mankind Chef Boyardee commercials gave me some ideas for this one, but it got stuck near the end for about 6 months. In the meantime, some other guy made Mr. T vs. Mankind, (which really wasn't that good...) and a lot of the ideas for this page became out of date (but are now back in date, since Mankind ravioli commercials and Cactus Jack have returned...) Also uses the cool-ass Javascript thingy from Mr. T vs. Bizarro T. Bang bang!

MR. T vs. SARGENT 'D' AND THE S.O.D. - Yet anSargent D is coming, and Mr. T is on his listother "Mr. T vs. Heavy Metal" page, with Mr. T taking on the infamous Stormtroopers of Death, led by their mascot, the sinister Sgt. D. Another one with a large cast, featuring S.O.D. (which includes Scott Ian, who was in T vs. Anthrax and Galvatron, and Charlie Benante who appeared in those two, and a cameo in T vs. Pantera), Robert Vaughn, Darryl Hall, Isaac Hayes, Ronnie James Dio, and Nikki Cox. A milestone here, as this was my first Mr. T vs. X page to include an animation made with Shockwave Flash.

Click HERE to hear "The Ballad of George Peppard"